In praise of: Posties

Christmas at the Royal Mail

Another gem from Roy Mayall:

"Christmas is the most important time of the year for the Royal Mail. It is when the company comes into its own.

It’s not only about the volume of traffic, though this is phenomenal. People are receiving ten, fifteen, or twenty times their usual mail. And it’s not just Christmas cards either. Everyone is trying to sell you something. So there are endless catalogues, brochures, special offers, two-for-the-price-of-one deals.

And then, after this, there are the presents. People may not send as many letters as they used to, but they can sit up all night browsing the internet for gift ideas, paying for them by credit card, and getting them sent by post the next day. Most of this comes through the Royal Mail.

There’s something of the Dunkirk spirit in delivery offices at this time of year. It’s a veritable assault of mail, and postal workers are braced for the force of the attack. There are times when we feel like the last troops defending the beaches as a never ending barrage of letters and cards and magazines and parcels is thrown at us. And then, after that, we are like the little ships evacuating the mail through the channel, on our bikes and in our trolleys, safely delivering the post to your homes.

It’s a great feeling. There’s great camaraderie in the office, great spirit, and a huge sense of achievement when it’s all over; after which we get two days off work – Christmas Day and Boxing Day – before we resume our rounds again.

But – as I say – that’s not all there is to it.

There’s something else, something more subtle, but no less substantial.

Because we are not only delivering the mail. We are delivering goodwill. We are delivering keepsakes and remembrances. We are delivering thoughts of our friends. We are delivering Christmas wishes and New Year greetings from across the country and around the globe. We are more than just posties then. We are the thread that weaves through the fabric of society, binding it together.

You see, us posties are being grossly underestimated. You think that all we do is read an address and then stick the letter through the door, but there’s much more to it than that.

These days there’s immense pressure on us. We are carrying more mail than ever, and working at a faster pace. There has been a 30% reduction in staff levels in the last two years and increasing volumes, particularly of parcels. There are more part-time posties and casuals. There are more rounds being done on an ad-hoc basis with no full-time postie being assigned. There’s an ever increasing volume of junk mail being generated by data bases in computers sent to people who moved out years ago, to addresses that no longer exist".

Continue reading Christmas at the Royal Mail by Roy Mayall

NEW: Fomato cards

New to Cool Cards, a snarky big welcome to: Fomato cards.



A small greeting card company based in Los Angeles, Fomato was formed in 2004 by a group of disgruntled restaurant co-workers.



Emmie Hsu, the disgustingly talented designer of Fomato cards, just doesn't know when to stop when it comes to greeting card design. More often than not she fills the front, both inside pages AND the back page with snarky words and images.



Can you buy Fomato cards online elsewhere in the UK? No you can't.
Can you personalise these cards? No you can't. There isn't room.

12.5cm x 17.5cm - White envelope - not cello wrapped - NOT personalisabubble

Cool Cards
Cool cards: Fomato cards

In praise of: Royal Mail

Junk Mail

• The average home receives over 200 items of unwanted junk mail every year.

• Over half a million tonnes of junk mail is generated annually in the UK.

• UK junk mail uses 3.5 million trees each year.

Source: BBC - Junk Mail - Climate Change

• 17.5 billion pieces of junk mail are produced every year in the UK. This includes both addressed and unaddressed junk mail.

• To produce all this junk mail 550,000 tonnes of paper and 16.5 billion litres of water are used.

• 650 pieces of junk mail are posted through the average British letterbox every year.

• On average 80 pieces of addressed junk mail are sent out to the 583,000 people who die every year in the UK following their death.

Source: Stop Junk Mail


How can you help combat climate change, save over 4kg of CO₂ a year, reduce landfill, reduce the need for recycling and help postie at the same time? Here's one very simple way to do it: Sign up to the Mailing Preference Service and opt out of junk mail.

In praise of: Royal Mail

Roy Mayall (Roy Mayall - Royal Mail, geddit?)

Roy Mayall is a postman. 50 something. Lives down south and has been doing his round for "a number of years". Roy has the most fascinating blog detailing his working life and a portrays a wonderful view of life within the Royal Mail.

His book, 'Dear Granny Smith: A letter from your postman', is currently the Radio 4 Book of the Week. "A letter from your postman written by Roy Mayall and delivered by Philip Jackson; a heartfelt musing on the past, present and future role of one of the oldest British institutions, the Postie. Why postmen used to have the best job in the world, and why it's heading towards becoming the worst"



Listen to it here: Radio 4 Book of the Week

Visit the Roy Mayall blog: Going Postal

In praise of: Royal Mail

Night Mail.

December, busy time of year for the Royal Mail. Or rather, a busy time for its employees. Let's spare a thought and give thanks to this invaluable service and its dedicated workforce eh?

Let's start with a bit of nostalgia...

Night Mail.

Night Mail is a 1936 documentary film about a London, Midland and Scottish Railway (LMS) mail train from London to Scotland, produced by the GPO Film Unit. A poem by English poet W. H. Auden was specially written for it, used in the closing few minutes, as was music by Benjamin Britten.

Night Mail Poem - W. H. Auden:



Night Mail - Film:
Part 1.




Part 2.




Part 3.

New: Positive Ageing, Edward Monkton

Positive ageing and gay kittens.

Just in... Just-in, bit of a gay name is Justin, but true all the same... a bit Welsh.

Anyway. Just in...

From Edward Monkton: The Birthday Gayness Test.





We've made mention of Positive Ageing before now, but it seems to be slow progress... Edward seems to suggest why...



"OLD PEOPLE

Let us all LEARN from the Dignity
and Wisdom of the Old, for their
LIVES have been RICH and varied,
and their KNOWLEDGE is beyond
our normal understanding.

So... start SPEAKING!"



Where and how do old people learn how to begin to learn how to speak?

Design idea: Weird Books

Guess which are real books...



















Answer: They all are.

And, at the time of blogging, available to buy from from Abe books - Weird Book Room

Design idea: Nails

How expressive can a nail be? Czech photographer Vlad Artazov shows just how...

























Vlad Artazov
also: Design Swan

Positive Ageing - Active Ageing

Barnet Age Concern - Photography Competition results:

First prize:



"Walking couple by John King, aged 83
This photo, which took first place in the competition, was taken in Biot in the south France, shows Ralph, 74 and Pam, 68, formerly of Parkway, Camden (now resident in Cannes)".

Source and more photos: The Guardian
Cool Cards: Positive ageing

Design Idea: Double self-portraits

IMAGINE FINDING ME

I found these double self-portraits incredibly thought provoking. Images that seem to travel through time...
As a child, what might you ask your future self? As an adult, what would you ask or tell your childhood self? What might we hope to do differently..?

Chino Otsuka inserts modern photos of herself as an adult into photos of herself as a child.

1976 and 2005, Kamakura, Japan:


1985 and 2005, Tiananmen Square, Beijing, China:



1982 and 2005, Paris, France:





"If,
again
I have a chance to meet,
there is so much I want to ask
and so much I want to tell"

Source: Chino Otsuka

Psychology of Happiness

The Science of Happiness

Of course we all know all too well the immense, nay overwhelming, joy and happiness that can result of receiving a surprise greeting card from our loved ones, but what else can bring about an improvement in our mood?



Richard Wiseman aims to find out with his latest research study.
"We have just launched an ambitious new mass participation experiment designed to help cheer up the world! We need as many people as possible to take part, so please join in and feel free to encourage your friends, family and colleagues. It will take less than a minute each day".
More details at www.ScienceOfHappiness.co.uk

Seems Richard has started a recent Blog too, well worth a gander.

‘Excellent! A triumph of scientifically proven advice over the myths of self-help. Uplifting and long over-due’
Derren Brown

What's this got to do with greeting cards..? Not a lot. The somewhat tenuous link is with 'charity cards'. Richard Wiseman describes the following study: New Research: The baby in the wallet

"What is the best thing to put in your wallet to help increase the chances of it being returned if lost?

To find out, Prof Wiseman bought 240 wallets and filled them with the same set of everyday items, including raffle tickets, discount vouchers, and fake membership cards. Next, one of four photographs was added to four batches of forty wallets. The photographs depicted either a smiling baby, a cute puppy, a happy family, or a contented elderly couple. Another 40 wallets contained a card suggesting that the owner had recently made a contribution to charity, whilst the final batch of forty acted as a control and contained no additional item.

Within a week around half of the wallets were returned and a clear pattern emerged. Of the wallets that made their way back, only a handful were from the control group, or contained the charity card. The results from the wallets containing a photograph of the elderly couple, cute puppy, or happy-looking family were slightly more impressive, with return rates of 28%, 53% and 48% respectively. However, the winning wallets were those with the photograph of the smiling baby, taking poll position with an impressive 88% return rate".

Think back to when you first saw this piece, how did you feel when you saw the photo of the smiling baby?

So, to increase the chances of having your wallet returned, stick a cute baby photo in your wallet!
Me, I've put two dozen photo's in mine in the hope that not only might I get my wallet back, but that someone might stick an extra tenner in as well..!

Uncooked Cards - Interviewed

A lovely, typically off-beat, interview with Nat and Armand of Uncooked Cards



"How did Uncooked Cards begin?
The year was 2004. We were young and giddy and our bodies reeked of cod. We had just squeezed into our big sexy bathing suits to air ourselves out when suddenly the most glorious idea popped into our heads. uncooked cards! we eagerly jammed handfuls of jelly worms down our throats and began creating the most honest, most absurd, most strangest, sweetest line of greeting cards the world would ever know. Today, uncooked cards can be found in many stores around the world. With over 100 cards in the line, uncooked covers all areas of life- birthday cards, love cards, friendship cards, miss you cards, sorry cards, thank you cards, feel better cards, anniversary cards and of course, funny holiday cards.

Challenges of what you do?
We both have really tiny wrists. Our biceps and forearms are both normal size but both of our arms taper down to the size of number 2 pencil. Having small wrists makes it hard to grip things and hold up objects heavier than a baby hamster. Going into this, we knew our childlike wrists would impede the process and pose many, many challenges along the way. In fact, one of the reasons we decided to start a greeting card company of all things was because greeting cards were one of the few objects we could hold up for longer than five seconds. Still, between all the writing and drawing we do for the cards, our wrists still get very tired throughout the day. We have to soak them every 10 seconds, ice them every 6 seconds and rest them every 4 ½ seconds.

Plans to develop your brand in 2009?
After absolutely no research, we successfully determined Uncooked Cards would be a no brainer along the European countryside and parts of Japan. We carefully hand selected a team of untrained specialists to help us develop a machine that will project our cards onto all blank objects in these regions and charge peoples credit cards if they try to read it. It’s a pyramid scheme without the pyramid.

What makes uncooked cards so different?
They’re 110% recyclable, made entirely of ground up elephant tusks and packaged in a clear sleeve composed of the thin inner lining of reproductively challenged whale uteri. Our specialty inks are derived from the delicate tears of pre pubescent bald eagles that answer to the name 'Victor'
Also, they’re just funny.

Collaboration with MTV?
MTV hired Uncooked to write, illustrate and direct their latest brand image campaign based off our writing and illustration style. It was a great brand campaign and huge success for both MTV and Uncooked. Our frail wrists really hurt after that project.

Anything else?
We like to feel each other up over our shirts while watching the last crucial minutes of Deal or No Deal".

Source: Ninu nina
Buy Online: Cool Cards

Giles Andreae - Edward Monkton - Purple Ronnie - Interview

"Bottom burps, stinky feet and other poems

Old Etonian, friend of David Cameron, the (very) wealthy man behind the Purple Ronnie franchise ... there are numerous reasons not to like Giles Andreae. But, warns Jon Henley you should never judge a book by its cover...



Let us count the reasons not to like Giles Andreae. He went to Eton, and to Oxford. He shares a bright and airy office in Notting Hill with Richard Curtis. And with Mariella Frostrup. He's a very old, very good friend of David Cameron. And he must be worth (I'm guessing, but I can't be very far wrong) substantially in excess of £5m.

He makes that much money writing ditties such as this: "You're a very special person/And you mean a lot to me/When you're around you make the world/A better place to be." Or this: "I know that it sounds cheesy/But I'm telling you it's true/It's fab to have a Mum/Who is as marvellous as you." Then he illustrates them with stick-figures a five-year-old might be proud of, puts them on a greeting card or into a Little Book, and sells them. So far, he has sold 80m cards, and five million books".

Continue reading: The Guardian
Cool Cards: Edward Monkton Cards

Chocolate birthday card

JOY LAUNCHES CHOCOL-ART, THE BIRTHDAY CARD GOOD
ENOUGH TO EAT

"The dream of creating an edible birthday card has finally become a reality for fine art illustrator Joy Cockle of Waddington based CreARTivity.

Joy came up with the concept a year ago and with the help of Longridge based Corper Deli has brought her idea to life and launched a range of fine illustration edible cards called Chocol-ART.

Commenting on the launch of the new range Joy said, “Like so many other people I love eating chocolate and whilst I’ve been illustrating greetings cards over the last few years I often wondered if I could transfer my creations onto chocolate and present it as an edible birthday card.

“I discussed the idea with Simon Edwards from the Corper Deli who completely bought into the idea, purchased the machinery and created a sample…and Chocol-ART was born!”

The chocolate birthday cards are available in milk, plain or white chocolate varieties in three designs, two featuring Joy’s signature Jester and the other a birthday cake design.

Joy continued, “We’re convinced these are the first truly illustrated chocolate birthday cards and initial sales have been very good. I’m currently working on a number of other card designs and would also welcome commissions, which would include an original piece of artwork as well as the birthday card…a real treat for that special birthday.

“The cards are only available at my workshop at Backridge Farm, but I’m currently talking to other gift retailers across Lancashire with a view to making the Chocol-ART range available to all.”

For more information about the Chocol-ART birthday cards, contact Joy on 01200 429337 or visit Joy’s workshop and gallery at Backridge Farm, Twitter Lane, Waddington which is open daily from 10am to 4pm".

Source: Backridge Farm

Good Luck

Police officer, brother start greeting card business

"We share the same brain," he said.


"Cpl. Clarence "Buzz" Cornwell has issued plenty of speeding tickets and traffic citations during his 14 years with the county Police Department. Margeaux Corby — The Capital County police Cpl. Clarence “Buzz” Cornwell, left, and Douglas Sentz Jr. show off the first products of their new greeting card business, D & B Originals LLC.

The graduation card is currently available at the company’s Web site at www.myspace.com/dandboriginals. But in recent weeks he's been handing out a different kind of document - greeting cards.

Cornwell, along with his brother, Douglas Sentz Jr., recently announced the start of their boutique greeting card business, D & B Originals LLC. The company's first product, a graduation greeting card, is available for purchase on their Web site at www.myspace.com/dandboriginals. Cornwell, whose haircut mirrors his nickname, said he hasn't tried to use his experience on the force to create "license and registration, please" or "you're going downtown, pal" cards. "I can come up with some ideas," Cornwell said jokingly. "I only have about six years left. I'm hoping to get my pension and move on to bigger things."

Both Cornwell and his brother said they talked about starting a business for several years and wanted to create a company unique to the county and their talents. "If you can support a company that is local and that is putting the money right back into local sales people, local graphic designers and keeping everything else going, you should buy our card," Sentz said.

The brothers are not the only family members involved in the company. Cornwell's brother-in-law, Joe Gaeta, is the company's graphic designer and his wife, Kelly, will use her artistic ability to help design cards in the future. "My wife is excellent with drawing and art," Cornwell said. "We want to come up with different ideas for cards, and we might have her come up with the artwork."

The graduation card that is currently available for purchase contains a motivational and forward-thinking message taken from a poem Sentz wrote years ago. "He's always been a little bit more creative than me, but we've always thought of the big picture," Cornwell said, referring to his brother. "We didn't grow up with a lot of money and we just wanted a better life for ourselves, and we figured this is the best way to do it."

Cornwell will co-own the business in addition to his normal patrol duties and the occasional off-duty hours he spends working security jobs around the county. His brother is a retail manager for a small business in the county and a former freelance writer for local companies.

The brothers are currently in the process of contacting local stores to sell their cards. Sentz said they hope to have about 10 cards on the market by the end of the year, all of which will have original designs and messages not already on the market. "There are a million cards that say 'I love you, Mom' but can we say something that's different? If we can't then we're not going to do it," he said.

Neither Cornwell nor Sentz said they are worried about the potential strain of being brothers as well as business partners. Cornwell said he couldn't remember the last time the two quarreled and Sentz agreed. "We share the same brain," he said".

Source: Annapolis The Capital

Hallmark expand, go green

Good news Hallmark

"Hallmark was recognised for using 100 per cent renewable electricity at its offices; printing 97 per cent of cards and 100 per cent of envelopes using certified sustainable or recycled materials and recycling 80 per cent of solid waste, reducing landfill by 200 tonnes in the past two years; donating £750,000 over three years to breast cancer research; and for its commitment to Bradford Cares, allowing employees to volunteer during work time."

"A new £12 million warehouse and distribution centre which puts Bradford at the forefront of the European greetings card industry has been opened.

David Hall, grandson of the founder of Hallmark Cards, flew in to cut the ribbon at the group’s largest single investment in the business on this side of the Atlantic.

The new 200,000 sq ft distribution centre uses computerised technology to pick, sort and pack up to 30,000 boxes of cards an hour for shops and major chains.

It replaces warehousing at Hallmark’s UK head office site on Bingley Road, Heaton, Bradford, part of which is to be developed for housing. Around 150 staff have been transferred to the new site and Hallmark employs 2,300 people in Bradford.

Mr Hall, president and chief executive of the group’s greeting cards business which next year will celebrate its centenary, said the new development demonstrated Hallmark’s commitment to its Bradford base.

It has been developed alongside the firm’s greeting cards printing plant on a 17-acre site on Dawson Lane, Dudley Hill, once occupied by Renold Gears.

Mr Hall said: “The investment, especially during these challenging economic times, demonstrates our eagerness to remain a leader in our industry. It also highlights our continued and significant commitment to Bradford.

“This new facility really will make a significant impact on several areas of our business, improving efficiencies and increasing capacity across the board. It was fantastic to be able to come here to see for myself these state-of-the-art facilities which will soon be making a huge difference to our business and that of our customers.”

Group operations director Richard Campbell said: “We are confident we have developed a unique system that allows us to pick and distribute orders efficiently, providing the best possible value and service for our customers.”

Hallmark has won a gold award from Business in the Community for its community and environmental policies. It also gained platinum status in the Yorkshire and Humber Environment Index.

Hallmark was recognised for using 100 per cent renewable electricity at its offices; printing 97 per cent of cards and 100 per cent of envelopes using certified sustainable or recycled materials and recycling 80 per cent of solid waste, reducing landfill by 200 tonnes in the past two years; donating £750,000 over three years to breast cancer research; and for its commitment to Bradford Cares, allowing employees to volunteer during work time".

Source: Bradford Telegraph & Argus

Unhappy Birthdays

Unhappy Birthdays for 650 staff as card shops fold

“We got told last Wednesday that we were closing. They are keeping us open to Sunday because that’s Fathers Day but when we close the doors then that’s it.”

"Administrator Peter Saville, partner at Zolfo Cooper Europe, announced that 201 Birthdays branches had been saved. But sadly, the Graham Street branch didn’t make the cut.

Mr Saville said: “We are pleased to announce that an offer has been accepted and are hopeful that the contract will be finalised in a matter of days. No purchaser has been forthcoming for the remaining stores or the head office at Bury and we will be implementing a closure programme with immediate effect, with all stores scheduled to cease trading by close of business on Wednesday, June 24"

“Regrettably around 800 jobs will be made redundant across the group.

“All employees have been made aware of the situation and we are grateful for the understanding and support of staff, customers and suppliers throughout the administration process.

“We will also be writing to all landlords shortly to inform them fully of the situation.”

Source: Lanarkshire Airdie & Coatbridge Advertiser

Former owner Clintons buys back 196 stores of stricken card chain out of administration in £3.5m deal but a third of jobs will go.

"About 650 jobs have been lost after the administrators running the stricken Birthdays card chain sold part of it back to its former owner Clintons Cards.

Clintons has bought back 196 of Birthdays' 322 shops, saving 1,450 jobs. The remaining stores, which are all understood to be loss-making, are now closing or have already been shuttered.

It comes just a month after Clintons put the loss-making Birthdays into administration, saying it could no longer support the subsidiary, which it bought in December 2004 for £46m. The deal is valued at £3.5m, but Clintons is only paying £250,000, and agreeing to write off £3.25m still owed by Birthdays.

One retail analyst said today's deal "looked a bit like financial engineering", adding that Clintons had blundered by buying Birthdays in the first place.

Shares in Clintons jumped by 15% to 25.4p today".

Source: The Guardian

Design Idea - Word Clouds

Design ideas: Wordle

"Wordle is a toy for generating “word clouds” from text that you provide. The clouds give greater prominence to words that appear more frequently in the source text".

Our first Cool Cards word cloud, the entire text of a 400 year old play... Have a guess.


Image link to original:

Wordle: Wordle
Text: Project Gutenburg - Romeo and Juliet
Wiki: Romeo and Juliet

--------------------------

Like that? Here's more... it just gets better. Hugely talented data-mining bloke called Jeff Clark of Neoformix tells us "I enjoy discovering the patterns in the apparent chaos of real life".



His creativity is apparent...
Source: Neoformix

Have a go... Word Hearts also from Neofomix: "This is a simple tool that automatically fills a heart shape with any words you like. Enter some words separated by commas in the text box and press the 'Enter' key. You can also choose one of three fonts or change the colors".

Our go...

Postman Pot...

Jail for postman too stoned to deliver the mail

Rarely we receive an email : Subject - Order not received.
Blame the...

"A YORK postman has been jailed for burning stacks of mail in his garden after smoking so much cannabis he was too lazy to deliver it.
Neil Goddard, 32, was given a 12-month sentence after he set up a huge cannabis factory in his bedroom and managed to cultivate 8,000 pounds of the drug.

But he smoked so much of it over a year-old period that he was too high to bother delivering thousands of items of post.

Judge Stephen Ashurst told him at York Crown court: "All postmen know that those who interfere with the post in the course of their work face severe consequences. They are inevitably sacked and very often go to prison.

"You went to very considerable lengths to set up what I regard as a professional cannabis unit. I could not possibly justify passing a community sentence for what you did."

Alan Mitcheson, prosecuting, said police found sacks of undelivered mail at Goddard's house, a pit containing charred fragments of junk mail and a cannabis unit in his bedroom capable of growing many crops.

They also found 227 letters and parcels and 9,675 leaflets and other door-to-door items which should have been delivered between April 2007 and March 2008. After checking Royal Mail records, they found Goddard had claimed £170 for 13 postal rounds he had never even started.

David Dixon, defending, said: "This was laziness brought about by excessive cannabis use. He stopped delivering junk mail which some may say was a public service."

Goddard admitted growing cannabis and was convicted of a charge of intending to supply it to others after a trial in April. He also asked for ten more offences of claiming payment for undelivered junk mail to be taken into consideration".

Source: Yorkshire Post

Father's Day - Beer is proof that god loves us and wants us to be happy

Bottles of beer will be given to fathers who attend church, in an alternative "blessing" for Father's Day.

Beer is proof that god loves us and wants us to be happy
(Urban Graphic greeting card)

"The plan to distribute ale has upset groups working to tackle alcohol abuse, but the Rt Rev John Inge, the Bishop of Worcester, said that it could help churches to attract more men.

He argued that the free beer was intended to be symbolic of "the generosity of God".

Men at St Stephen's church in Barbourne, Worcester, will be handed bottles of beer by children during the service. A prayer will be said for the fathers before the gifts are distributed.

The Ven Roger Morris, archdeacon of Worcester, who will be leading the service at St Stephen's today, said that it was a practical way of sending a message to fathers.

"I don't see any other time that we can stop and remember fathers, and this is a gesture saying 'Here's something that will bless you,'" he said.

"Posies of flowers are given to mums on Mothering Sunday and we wanted to give a laddish, blokeish gift to the men. A bottle of beer hits the mark. The whole of life is to be celebrated in church."

However, Don Shenker, chief executive of Alcohol Concern, criticised the Church, claiming that it was acting irresponsibly.

"Bearing in mind the country is facing rising health harms from its high level of alcohol consumption, anyone in a position of authority or respect should perhaps think twice about promoting alcohol to the public," he said.

Bishop Inge said that it was wrong to claim that the move would encourage alcoholism, and encouraged churches to use it as a way to reach out to men.

"Jesus created a lot more wine at a point in the party when some thought that there had already been enough drinking. He was all in favour of partying," the bishop said.

"We give wine away every Sunday, so giving away beer could be said to going downmarket a bit, but it's an attempt to speak of God's generosity.

"It's something that could be used as part of a service to encourage fathers to come. Once they are in church, hopefully they will be challenged by the deeper questions around fatherhood." "

Source : Telegraph

Father's Day

Father's Day cards, same old same old...
So often a stereotypical portrayal of the 'male species'... however true? And now ageist to boot...

One of our most popular Father's Day cards, from Uncooked:

dad i promise that when you get
old and gross i won't put you in
one of those smelly nursing homes.
i'll let you come and live with me.
if there's room.




What do other dads get up to..?






Blokes nowadays have it easy...